Steph’s worst nightmare

My roommate Liz and I were just discussing my complicated issues with red velvet cake. And then Facebook revealed this to her. If you want me to come to your wedding, I’m going to have to ask that you don’t have one of these:

Red velvet cupcakes

August 2, 2009. Tags: , , . Do not want, Eat this, Steph, Uncategorized. 1 comment.

Girl Who Doesn’t Age: So Freaky

Ahhh she’s 16!!

June 24, 2009. Do not want, News, Steph. Leave a comment.

12 terrifying pieces of furniture





from nadia from Fast Company. see more here.

June 22, 2009. Tags: . Becko, Design, Do not want. 1 comment.

Donuts destroy sewer system

In case you didn’t know already, donuts can do harm.

“The suit details problems with the plant dating as far back as 2004, describing a sewer facility permeated by the smell of doughnuts, pipes clogged with corrosive slime and the resulting raw sewage leaks that eventually shut down the southern Fairfax sewer system.

At one point, public works officials ran a closed-circuit camera along a pipe to show the grease deposits, only to get the camera stuck in the buildup.”

Oh dear.

June 14, 2009. Tags: , . Do not want, Eat this, News, Steph. 1 comment.

Breaking news: Dane Cook isn’t funny

Is anyone else watching him on Conan right now? Mmmm, not funny. He tells stories worse than I do.

June 11, 2009. Tags: , , . Do not want, Matate, Nora, Not pretty. Leave a comment.

Sexist vintage posters- harharhar

Check all 15 out here.  The ones below are some of my favorites…

And finally… this is me posting to CWL from my telex-whatchamacallit

Thanks Nadia

May 28, 2009. Tags: , , . Ads we like, Becko, Do not want, Matate. 3 comments.

Need a new rug? Meow you don’t!

A few of us here at CWL have moved or moved into new apartments recently, and I for one have been on the hunt for a new living room rug. Well, I should say that I WAS on the hunt until I found this one:

Only $29! What a steal!

May 18, 2009. Tags: , , , . Design, Do not want, Emily, I can has animals, Is this pretty?, Nora, Not pretty. Leave a comment.

RIP Black Betty’s

This is my FAVORITE restuarant in Brooklyn. I’ve had so many good times and so many memories there. I had my birthday party there 2 years ago and now I won’t be able to order their seared salmon salad or their spicey artichoke soup anymore. I am going to attempt to OD on everything before they close June 15th. sniffle.

From Brooklyn Vegan

“After 10 years, Williamsburg Live-Music Haven and Mediterranean Eatery Shuts Doors”

Black Betty (spreetaper)
Black Betty

“Bud Schmeling and Sandy Glover, owners of Black Betty, announced the long-time Williamsburg boite and eatery will close its doors, effectively Monday, June 15th 2009.”The sad news came a month after the owners posted a message to MySpace stating that they needed money, but that “Black Betty is not closed, nor closing. We have signed a new 10 year lease…” According to the new statement (which you can read in full below), the lease “was renewed for 10 years at the end of April 2009, however the lease was also offered to other perspective candidates under more lucrative terms…” Long story short, it is closing.

Lots of changes on that block. Black Betty is right across the street from the in-development Knitting Factory Brooklyn (ex-Luna Lounge) (which we still don’t have an official update on, though all signs and rumors point to the place re-opening some time this summer, possibly as a seated venue).

Say goodbye to Black Betty by having a drink and/or seeing a show there one more time (or for your first time). Options include The Phenomenal Handclap Band, who played Southpaw last night, and who are playing there tonight (May 13). Full schedule, including Antibalas, and full goodbye note, below…

Black Betty

– Bud Schmeling and Sandy Glover, owners of Black Betty, announced the long-time Williamsburg boite and eatery will close its doors, effectively Monday, June 15th 2009.

According to Schmeling and Glover, the Metropolitan Avenue in Brooklyn, NY lease was renewed for 10 years at the end of April 2009, however the lease was also offered to other perspective candidates under more lucrative terms. At the end of the battle, Schmeling and Glover conceded and agreed to close by mid June. “We are saddened and heart-broken that this is the end of the Black Betty era,” said Glover. “But at this time we’re focusing on what a fantastic place Betty means to Brooklyn bands, DJs and of course all of our amazing patrons and friends” she added.

“We’re working really hard to make the next couple of months loaded with great music and entertainment,” says Schmeling. “May 7th will mark a true celebration of 10 years dedicated to Williamsburg with a tribute to our House DJs and honestly, the outreach from the community has really been incredible.”

Local bands, DJs and performers are lining up to fill the remaining nightly slots, with Rev. Vince Anderson and His Love Choir scheduled to perform the last night, Monday June 15th. The kitchen and bar, offering North African and Mediterranean dishes and extended happy hours, will be in full swing until close. Demand for Black Betty t-shirts have been pouring in and will be available for sale at the 10th Anniversary Party on May 7th.

ABOUT BLACK BETTY/ Since its spring opening in 1999, Black Betty has gained a reputation as a “pioneer” and “Superman of Williamsburg nightlife.” Founders Bud Schmeling and Sandy Glover compiled their world travel experiences to transform the once gangster clad Highway Lounge into a hipster sanctuary and Moroccan delight, fondly referred to as “Trashablanca.” A true urban oasis, Black Betty beckons Williamsburg locals and tourists alike who crave an array of delectable Mid-Eastern eats, and an eclectic mix of live performers. Nightly live music and DJ spin masters serve up everything from Brazilian rock to soul funk, playing second only to the eclectic Mediterranean/ North African fare.

BLACK BETTY / 366 Metropolitan Avenue/ Williamsburg, Brooklyn/ 718.599.0243/ Train: L to Lorimer/ G to Metropolitan/
http://www.blackbetty.net
http://www.myspace.com/theblackbetty

May 14, 2009. Tags: , , , , , , . Becko, Brooklyn, Do not want. 1 comment.

These beards are gross

From the World Beard Championship

May 13, 2009. Tags: , . Do not want, Not pretty, Steph. Leave a comment.

Omg Lol …. bad tattoos

So many more gems.

May 3, 2009. Tags: , , , . Do not want, Matate, Not pretty, Steph. Leave a comment.

Cool/creepy photos of Grey Gardens

Thanks b for sending me these.

More photos.

(sorry steph- i’m adding more to your post…)

The photos are from a NYT slideshow of the Grey Gardens mansion…

A 1975 documentary captured the eccentric lives of Edith Bouvier Beale, known as Big Edie, and her daughter, Little Edie, in Grey Gardens, the filthy, dilapidated mansion they occupied in East Hampton.
Two years after Big Edie died in 1977, Little Edie sold the house to Sally Quinn and Benjamin C. Bradlee, who undertook a massive renovation. These photographs, which have never been seen by the public before, were taken by a photographer hired by Ms. Quinn at the time she and her husband purchased the house, in order to capture the extent of the decay.
Correction: April 20, 2009
A previous version of this slideshow reported that Edith Bouvier Beale died in 1979. She died in 1977 and the house was sold in 1979.

I can’t wait to see Grey Gardens with Drew Barrymore on HBO. Steph, I should come visit you in DC and have a watching party.

May 3, 2009. Tags: , , , , , , , . Do not want, Steph. 2 comments.

Swine Flu PSAs from way back when

The second one is really creepy.

April 28, 2009. Tags: , . Ads we like, Do not want, FYI, I can has animals, News, Steph, TV, Uncategorized, World saving. 3 comments.

Do not want

This isn’t cute. Or even kitschy. It’s just gross.

No thanks, Design Milk.

April 21, 2009. Tags: . Design, Do not want, Fashiony, I can has animals, Is this pretty?, Matate, Nora, Not pretty. Leave a comment.

The Blankoat: a high-end snuggie

It was very very cold
so was made Blankoat

And you can win one!

April 8, 2009. Tags: , , . Do not want, Fashiony, Matate, Not pretty, Steph. Leave a comment.

See my fancy long hair?

Mesmerizing.  via Dlisted. Also here is his Youtube channel, described as: “This page is devoted to long hair. I belong to the rare species of guys who like to grow their hair really long. I have many other interests but you won’t find anything about them here…”

April 7, 2009. Tags: , , , , . Do not want, Emily, Fashiony, Not pretty, Videos, Viral. 2 comments.

Female Urinals: what gives?

In my unnamed office building, 30 out of the 120 bathrooms contain something called “female urinals.” They look like this. I have no idea how to use them. Luckily a high-level governmental official has been made aware of the problem.

I got this image from a site called urinal.net.

March 31, 2009. Tags: . Do not want, Matate, Not pretty, Politicals, Steph. 2 comments.

Funny but so wrong

Delicious Obama Fingers

March 28, 2009. Do not want, Eat this, Matate, Politicals, Steph. Leave a comment.

Your vote required – which bathing suit is more likely to appear in your nightmares?

So my sister and I had a race tonight to find the world’s ugliest bathing suit. Here are the three that I think are the absolute worst. Please vote on which one you believe to be most unflattering.

Option A

From Victoria’s Secret for $164 (I shit you not)

Option B

Also from Vicky’s, but amazinly on sale for $34 (they’re practically giving them away…gee, I guess NOBODY WANTED TO BUY IT)

Option C

From Delias for $29.50


March 27, 2009. Tags: , , , , . Do not want, Fashiony, Is this pretty?, Matate, Nora, Not pretty, Viral. 3 comments.

Teeth ice cube trays

gross! I do not want this teeth ice in my bedwater!  That has the potential to haunt my dreams.   Drew’s find from here.

March 19, 2009. Tags: , , , , . Do not want, Emily, Matate. Leave a comment.

If I ever tell you I want to watch Gossip Girl…

shoot me in the face please. Because this show is terrible. Seriously. It’s a brain abortion.

epicfail

March 16, 2009. Tags: , , , , . Do not want, Eat this, FYI, Matate, News, Nora, Not pretty, Politicals, TV. 3 comments.

Athlete Life Fail



This article was really interesting and sad.
Reason number 385983 to to use condoms: you don’t want to be paying child support on nine different kids. I’ve been posting a lot about the need to use protection lately, huh?

March 11, 2009. Do not want, FYI, Matate, News, Steph. Leave a comment.

Weird. I don’t get it. Why?

I think the couch dress has already been posted. But why would people pay actual money for this.

Wow this site is really starting to freak me out.

March 7, 2009. Do not want, Fashiony, Is this pretty?, Matate, Steph. Leave a comment.

When you’re just having one of those days

Post something here: http://www.fmylife.com/. I might have to write them about my commute to work on Monday when it was really snowy.

March 5, 2009. BOD: Blog of the Day, Do not want, FYI, Innernette, Steph. Leave a comment.

King croc comes a cropper in Hendala (??)

Crazy news from Sri Lanka

February 24, 2009. Do not want, Eat this, I can has animals, Matate, Steph. Leave a comment.

I watched this without sound

But its message is clear.

February 24, 2009. Ads we like, Do not want, Steph. 2 comments.

it’s GROUNDHOG DAAAAAAAY

and the groundhog says there’ll be more winter bitches. apparently phil came, or rather was pulled out of, this fake log thing. how can they determine if it can see its shadow if there are flood lights on him?

get the details here

Phil Says “Six More Weeks of Winter!”

Phil’s official forecast as read February 2nd, 2009 at sunrise at Gobbler’s Knob:

Hear Ye Hear Ye

On Gobbler’s Knob this glorious Groundhog Day, February 2nd, 2009

Punxsutawney Phil, Seer of Seers, Prognosticator of all Prognosticators

Awoke to the call of President Bill Cooper

And greeted his handlers, Ben Hughes and John Griffiths

After casting a joyful eye towards thousands of his faithful followers,

Phil proclaimed that his beloved Pittsburgh Steelers were World Champions one more time

And a bright sky above me

Showed my shadow beside me.

So 6 more weeks of winter it will be.


February 2, 2009. Tags: , , , . Add this to your calendar, Becko, Do not want, I can has animals. Leave a comment.

A scene for Charlotte

Sucks to be these deer.

February 1, 2009. Do not want, FYI, I can has animals, Steph. Leave a comment.

Meetz does not want to sleep in this CROC

Gross! Who am I to talk really.. I have to admit I bought some Ugg-like boots yesterday after a long hatred of them, so maybe Crocs are up next for me.   JK JK never!

January 30, 2009. Tags: , , , . Do not want, Emily, Fashiony, I can has animals, Matate. 2 comments.

Whoa there dude

I’m going to the Black Cat tonight. Maybe I can meet a nice guy like this one.

January 24, 2009. Do not want, Innernette, Steph. Leave a comment.

I am whiney sinusface

See diagram above for what my sinuses feel like.  Wonder how i got sick!?! jkkkkk.

January 14, 2009. Tags: , , , , , . Do not want, Emily. Leave a comment.

EW EW EW BABY BORN WITH FOOT TUMOR IN HIS BRAIN

take it away, Today Show!

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/18424824#28635991

January 14, 2009. Tags: , , . Do not want, Matate, News, Nora, Not pretty, Videos. 1 comment.

True love is shown through braids

BARF!!!  via Dlisted via Urlesque..

January 9, 2009. Tags: , , . Do not want, Emily, Fashiony. 5 comments.

Even Diddy can’t believe Joaquin Phoenix’s new look

Via Dlisted, and I quote- “No, Diddy, he hasn’t been moisturizing the sexy. Joaquin hasn’t even been bathing the sexy. Obviously.”

December 31, 2008. Tags: , , , . Do not want, Emily, Matate. Leave a comment.

Border Patrol Fail

I assume watching this with sound only makes it more hilarious.

December 30, 2008. Do not want, Matate, Steph. Leave a comment.

Robot soldiers??

I didn’t really read this. I admit it. But robots as soldiers?? Did this guy see the Simpsons episode where the robotos at Itchy and Scratchy Land go crazy?

December 21, 2008. Tags: , , . Do not want, Steph. Leave a comment.

Duggar Family: Stop having babies please

I mean, c’mon. Seriously. Your uterus must be aching.

December 20, 2008. Tags: , , , , . Do not want, Eat this, Matate, News, Nora, Politicals, Viral. Leave a comment.

Oh DC crime…

When will you ever stop? Washington Mayor Adrian Fenty was confronted face-to-face Thursday with some of the district’s crime problems, when it turned out the host of the morning talk show he appeared on had been mugged in the city an hour earlier.

Thanks Justin for showing me this sotry.

December 18, 2008. Tags: , , . Do not want, News, Politicals, Steph, TV. Leave a comment.

Wussy Weatherman

I watched this with no sound but I can only assume that this man shrieks like a a girl.

December 15, 2008. Tags: , , . Do not want, I can has animals, News, Steph, TV. 1 comment.

Click at your own risk

Too scaring to embed.

December 9, 2008. Tags: , . Do not want, I can has animals, Not pretty, Steph. Leave a comment.

Seriously Campari?

Jessica Alba looks so much awesome without airbrushing.. maybe she has some minor polterwang going on, but that’s it.  She looks great and  PS she just had a damn BABY.  Campari you suck. Via HuffPo

December 8, 2008. Tags: , , , , . Do not want, Emily, Fashiony, Matate, Not pretty, Pretty. Leave a comment.

no cakefail here

holy snaps! it are your birthday Em! nom nom nomcakefale

speaking of cakefail, em, I almost put this pic up but decided no one should have to see such cakes so early on a saturday morning…

November 29, 2008. Tags: , , , . Add this to your calendar, Becko, Do not want, Emily. 1 comment.

Realty Fail

Thanks to Lucy for showing me this blog.

http://lovelylisting.blogspot.com/

November 25, 2008. Tags: , , . BOD: Blog of the Day, Do not want, Innernette, Matate, Not pretty, Steph. Leave a comment.

Flip flops & socks are never OK, even if there is a product designed for this combo

found the ad for flip flop socks in my customized gmail ads .. I think because I was gchatting about taking off my heels last night and walking the streets of New York in borrowed socks.  Dirty girl.  

i’d post the link to buy flip flop socks but i’m not encouraging that behavior.

November 1, 2008. Tags: , . Do not want, Emily, Fashiony, Matate, New York. 2 comments.

David Sedaris on Undecided Voters

“I look at these people and can’t quite believe that they exist. Are they professional actors? I wonder. Or are they simply laymen who want a lot of attention? To put them in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. “Can I interest you in the chicken?” she asks. “Or would you prefer the platter of shit with bits of broken glass in it? To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked.”

October 24, 2008. Tags: , . Do not want, Eat this, Steph. Leave a comment.

God we hope she’s funny

October 22, 2008. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , . Do not want, Emily, Is this pretty?, Nora. 1 comment.

Horrifying

From the McCain rally in Virginia Beach. Also, what’s up with the dude’s shirt behind this woman?

October 14, 2008. Tags: , , . Do not want, Not pretty, Politicals, Steph. 4 comments.

My little pony

Those who’ve been to Ocracoke surely remember the giant rearing pony in front of the Pony Island Motel. And you can’t miss its giant cock and balls. Just wanted to point out that this is not what a horse’s package actually looks like. And it’s the most detailed part of the statue. Weird.

October 12, 2008. Tags: , , , . Do not want, I can has animals, Matate, Not pretty, Steph. 3 comments.

Remember that time I went to Tokyo

and was mistaken for a Spaniard? So embarrassing.

It can’t embed, so check it out here: http://static.reuters.com/resources/flash/include_video.swf?edition=US&videoId=91851. It has some butts in it, so don’t watch it someplace that will get you in trouble.

stolen from videogum

October 7, 2008. Tags: , , , , . Dan, Do not want, Innernette, Matate, Videos. Leave a comment.

Another Interesting McCain Fact

I’ve posted before on how John McCain was once hot and that his hair turned entirely white during his first six weeks as a POW…but did you know he also can’t lift his arms higher than this? Yeah, it’s cause he was tortured for six years. Sad sad sad. Still doesn’t make him a good president. Well, it doens’t NOT make him a good president either, but you get my drift.

October 7, 2008. Do not want, FYI, Politicals, Steph. 1 comment.

Can I choose my VP based on flute skills?

Cause Sarah Palin BLOWS.  hehe.  See what I did there?  But seriously, she’s really flat and her low register is terrible.  She’d never last in flute choir.

Ready for the debate??

October 2, 2008. Tags: , , , , , . Do not want, Emily, Matate, Music, Politicals. 1 comment.

Spice up your life

Surprise! Naked people are on your bed!! I want a new comforter, but not this one, I don’t think. I’m really bothered by the fact that these naked folks have no heads. Get out of my bed headless nudes!  OH wait, when you’re IN the bed YOU LOOK NAKED!  hehe.  But still creepy when the bed is made.

October 1, 2008. Tags: , , , . Do not want, Emily, Not pretty. 2 comments.

An infuriating video

New buzzword: Gotcha journalism.

From Wonkette: Because she’s masochistic, Sarah Palin went back for more inquisition with her MORTAL FOIL, the ancient fire dragon Katie Couric. Of course this time she brought her actual father, John McCain, to come and sit in and change the subject when Katie Couric starts getting mean. Palin sounds, uh, better(?), and is able to not completely mangle her 2002-era platitudinous bullcrap about “the terrorists.” On the other hand, Palin comes off as extremely pathetic because JOHN MCCAIN HAS TO DEFEND HER CONSTANTLY FROM KATIE COURIC.

September 30, 2008. Tags: . Do not want, News, Politicals, Steph, TV. 1 comment.

FYI: Suede’s collection is horrible

I guess I’m not that surprised.

September 25, 2008. Tags: , . Do not want, Fashiony, Not pretty, Steph, TV. 2 comments.

Crazy Chinese!

My friend Chad was invited to speak at a conference in China put on by the Association for Soft Sciences. Here’s their website: www.ASSCHINA.org

I’d do a google image search of Ass China, but I’m scared to do that at work. But serious, Ass China??

September 24, 2008. Tags: . Do not want, Matate, Steph. 1 comment.

Eat me crunchy: Do want.

My roommate sent this to me after she saw meet eating some soggy cherrios. She also sent me this.

 

I’m actually not an edge lover, but it’s a pretty cool idea. When are they going to make a pan for center lovers? I guess that’s just called a normal pan.

September 22, 2008. Tags: , . Do not want, Eat this, Steph, Want, World saving. 3 comments.

AMY POEHLER IS LEAVING SNL??

No way!!!!!!!!!

Amy Poehler: Leaving ‘Saturday Night Live’ will be ‘hard’

Tuesday, September 16th 2008, 2:16 PM

Amy Poehler is leaving “Saturday Night Live” after this season in order to focus on family.

The comedienne/actress, who expecting her first child with “Arrested Development” star Will Arnett, talked about parting with the show during an interview with Men’s Vogue.

“It’s gonna be really hard – Boyz II Men hard – to say goodbye to yesterday,” Poehler jokingly said of her nearly seven-year stint on the show.

“‘SNL’ was dangerous, late-night, last-minute and star-studded, but like any good drug, you need to know when to put it down.”

According to an SNL rep, the actress is staying with the show until her baby is born.

Though the mom-to-be makes no guarantee for a return to late-night TV, the star is reportedly working on her own show with “The Office” producers and writers at NBC.

Just last weekend, Poehler made headlines again for her spot-on portrayal of Senator Hillary Clinton in SNL’s season premiere.

I guess I have to cite The NY Daily News for the story, but jesus, Daily News, lay off the linking to your goddamn photos. Just report the fucking story.

September 17, 2008. Tags: , , , , , , , . Do not want, News, Nora, Not pretty. Leave a comment.

Oh Noes! Not again!

Watch out Florida. Ike is coming and boy is he huge.

Forecaster warns of ‘certain death’ as Ike looms.

September 12, 2008. Tags: . Do not want, News, Not pretty, Steph. Leave a comment.

Yeah, what Emily said.

Em brought up a good point in her mcdonald’s post. Why is it that all of a sudden jazz, a good education, community organizing and cosmopolitanism are considered bad, boo-worthy things? Roger Ebert (yeah, I didn’t know he wrote op-ed seither) thinks its ridiculous too, especially because we’re talking about the qualities we want to see from a future world leader here.

September 12, 2008. Tags: , . Do not want, News, Politicals, Steph. Leave a comment.

I don’t get it either, Tim.

People magazine calls it Katie’s chic streak, but I agree with Tim Gunn. The baggy rolled up pants are weird. Cute haircut though. Want.

September 5, 2008. Do not want, Fashiony, Is this pretty?, Steph, Want. 2 comments.

Talk about a low blow..

This can’t be real, can it??

here’s the about us section:

“Not to cut the story to short or anything but a bunch of us got bitter, disenchanted and crabs, so we wanted to put our college educations in biology to good use. We brought on an MBA guy (who says we can’t use his name, and he’s smart for it I’m sure) and today we’re right here. We may be the scum of the earth, but we’re making an honest living doing the very thing you wish you could do, which is give crabs to your ex.”

FYI – for $298 the Gold Package can be yours.. and those are the shampoo-resistant crabs. Zing!

hahaha.  It’s fake it’s fake.  that kind of got me.

September 5, 2008. Tags: , , , , , , , . Do not want, Emily, I can has animals, Matate. Leave a comment.

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